Well, it goes without saying that the first date with a lady of your dream is a bit frightening because you want everything to flow just perfectly. However, there are some basic rules men have to follow not to scare off a girl they like. Otherwise, your first date may turn out to be the last. So, which taboo statements are we talking about?
Phrases to avoid at the first date
Taboo #1 “Tell me all your secrets”
No matter how intriguing and inspiring this phrase may sound, it is of a little practical value. Let’s try to figure out why it is so. In the first place, all women are rather mysterious creatures, and exactly this sense of mystery makes men want to conquer them.
So, why dig a grave for yourself by such demands? Imagine she really tells you everything on the first date, and you will lose all interest in her. Why deprive yourself of the excitement of gradually opening a girl’s hidden sides?
Secondly, this statement excludes the possibility of a meaningful conversation since if she is the only one talking during a meeting, there is hardly a place for interaction. You may think that such a phrase shows your genuine interest in her and her true personality, but in reality, it will only put her on the alert. Wondering why it is so?
Because typically, when a guy and a girl get acquainted, a man is trying to impress his interlocutor, to show himself in the most favorable light. If this doesn’t happen and he leaves all the talking for a woman, she may start suspecting that he wants to hide something from her or isn’t that honest man and so on.
Besides, won’t you be sick and tired of listening to all the details of her previous unsuccessful relationship or her recent visit to a hair-dresser? In order not to start yawning while she is telling her stories (and she has an immense number of them and is much more talkative that you are!), you’d better not provoke her to be that sincere with you right away.
Also, you risk being trapped another way: the more she is telling you, the more details you are supposed to remember. Since when she finds out you don’t remember even a half of the things she’s told you, you’ll be labeled as the most inattentive and uncaring guy ever.
Taboo #2 “I feel somewhat nervous”
Bet you don’t want to be with a girl who merely sympathizes with you. To be more precise, sympathy from her side turns you into her friend, not a man of her dreams. Do you remember that girls are raised on fairy tales about brave knights fighting multiple-headed dragons to save helpless princesses?
Even if not every girl is looking for a prince on a white horse to come and rescue her from a ruthless world, each of them needs a reliable mature man, not a sissy boy with a sack of insecurities.
Sure, you cannot help feeling nervous, but you don’t need to tell her that naked truth! Keep in mind that genuine attraction cannon be built on pity since we tend to love the ones we admire, and we can admire only people who are stronger than us. Besides, alpha-males aren’t afraid of anything!
Taboo #3 “Let’s repeat this some other day”
What’s wrong with this typical general phrase? Well, it’s absolutely meaningless because it suggests nothing particular! If you utter such a phrase, you only underline that you are insecure about yourself and girl’s desire to see you again! But alpha-males are confident about themselves and they exclude the slightest possibility of others disliking them!
That’s their key to success: not wondering if a girl likes them but acting as if she already liked them and couldn’t reject his suggestions! Thus, you should change this phrase to something more precise like “When we meet next Sunday, what exotic dish would you like to try?” Guess now you feel the difference between two phrases. The first one is full of doubt whereas the second one is imbued with the utmost confidence.
Taboo #4 “I hope you like the place I’ve chosen”
You see, the point is that Ukrainian women especially appreciate confident reliable men who are sure about themselves and the offers they make. Thus, you have to act as a genuine alpha-male. Don’t get it wrong at this point; it doesn’t mean you have to be rude or impolite, no way! You just should be confident about the choices you make and able to take responsibility for your words and actions.
So, let’s imagine that a girl doesn’t like a place you’ve chosen for a date. Once you notice it, try to approach the situation somewhat playfully. Smile at her confidently and tell her: “Seems you don’t like the venue, do you?” Make sure it sounds not like a question but a statement since you never have to show that you doubt your decisions or feel sorry about them.
You are strong and reliable, remember? Then suggest a girl choosing a place for the next date herself. Also, you can compensate for her dislike of the venue by doing some nice things during your meeting. If a girl really likes you, she will notice and appreciate your efforts; otherwise, you don’t need a girl who is not into you but trendy places, do you?
Taboo #5 “You look wonderful tonight”
Another popular compliment, agree? However, exactly its vagueness makes it completely ineffective. Intending to tell her she is gorgeous tonight, you risk being considered as the plainest and most unimaginative guy ever. Still wondering if she wants to meet you again? Remember that every girl is unique and she likes hearing what makes her so special to you.
Therefore, put as much effort as needed to notice the details that distinguish her from others this night. Of course, you should not necessarily be a poet praising her beauty and soul (though it is a useful idea), but try your best to make your compliments a bit elaborate. You know that women love with their ears, don’t you?
Thus, you may say, for example, that a tiny stone in her earrings perfectly fits her brooch and ask if it is made of amber. Or why not ask how much time it took her to make her hair that wavy?
Now, we know that men aren’t used to paying attention to details because they are assessing a woman’s image in general and deciding whether they like her or not, but this is the exact reason why girls will truly appreciate such unique compliments. And you know, if a girl appreciates you, it means she believes you can make her happy, and happiness is her ultimate goal while looking for a partner! Thus, pluck up your courage, learn to notice the details, and you will be truly rewarded for your pains!